Monday, February 08, 2010

the start of the story of goodbye

30 comments:

d. moll, l.ac. said...

Love Fats, I second that emotion.

Alice said...

dearest everyone,

i couldn't put this on the front page more plainly than i just did, but for those of you who check the comment section i figure you're the ones who need to know. i keep hoping that words would come to me that could be read in a way that wouldn't bring tears for any of us. so i've been waiting to make this post. i've been trying to compose myself and his tribute. every time i start there is no composure to be found. in time i'll add the words as i can but for now please know that i needed to somehow start this part of the process.

our precious fats has left his body. the week or so before his passing he was paralyzed by the growths of his cancer. even though all he could move were his ears and his tongue, he never gave up. he never stopped eating, he never stopped loving, he never stopped being a smile. the last few hours of his life were spent licking and kissing my whole face from top to bottom and side to side. then after almost 4 hours of this he got a little ansy. i put him down and slept beside him on the floor. a few hours later i woke up with a jolt to discover he had gone.

i'll be posting more photos of him and will keep his memory alive, but i thought it was time to open up this part of this part of his story to you and try moving the grief to gratitude, gratitude to him and gratitude for all bunnies who bring so much joy to our lives. so i thank you dearest fats, i thank you for letting me be the one who got to take care of you, you mighty king of a being. and i thank you all for loving him with me. blessings be.

meave said...

Oh Fats, sweet dear darling Fats. I'm so sorry to hear this. Your photos and videos of him brought us so much happiness. I'm so glad he got to spend the end of his life with his best beloved person.

tamara said...

Well, i for one can't keep the tears back. I think perhaps Fats would enjoy knowing that one of his human fans is sitting in her very important office looking like a very important silly-pants crying and smiling at the same time, because no thought of Fats, no matter how sad, can be without a smile. I've loved getting to know him, but also getting to see the amazing relationship you have with him (and always will). I love your video'd conversations and debates with him. I love watching his floofy ears respond to your voice. I love how rabbity he is, so full of himself and totally unaware of how comical he actually looks. Thank you for sharing him.

I think one of the only things in the world that could soothe me when I lost my beloved Marvin was stories and videos of other buns. I still have a hard time looking at photos and vids of my Marvin, even though he's been gone for almost two years. But he visits me in my dreams sometimes, and it's very nice to see him.

If you'd like to share the funny bunnys that so generously let me share their home and lives now (Herbert and Rosie), they are here: http://tinyurl.com/ycdmsk9

Much love from Seattle.
Tamara

Kristen said...

Oh, I am so, so, sorry! I only 'knew' Fats from a distance, and only for a short period of time, but it was obvious that he was quite a character. You must ache for him.

Deepest condolences. Rset in peace, dear Fats. And thanks for the smiles. :)

tfangel said...

I'm so sorry. I never know what to say, but know the pain. Know that you gave him a great life with you, and let that be your comfort.

Vicki said...

Dear Alice,
I am sooo sorry that Fats has left. As I wrote in my first comment to you I have been following you and your buns for some time and though I haven't "talked" to you before yesterday I feel as if I know you. As I try and type this tears are pouring from my eyes. You have all brought such joy to my life. I know from past experience the pain and heartache you are going through. I just wish that I was able to give you a hug. Fats was blessed to have you as you were to have him. Your relationship with him has touched my heart in so many ways and has inspired me to try to be a better 'stupid hoomin'. Please know that you all are in my thoughts and prayers. I believe that Fats is now hopping through green grass and sunshine at the Rainbow Bridge just waiting for the day you will all be together again.

With much love,
Vicki

Christina said...

Dearest Fats and Mom,

We were so sad to learn about your trip to the bridge. Thru your sadness you were lifting us up with stories about your life and antics. You fought hard Fats but your body was tired. Your spirit remains with us and we will think of you often. I know Nemo and Stewart are with you across the bridge. Godspeed baby boy.

Elizabeth said...

Oh Fats, poor boy.
I saw the title and had a feeling he had passed. he was such a beautiful happy bun. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Malcolm Russell said...

I know how hard this has been for you, Alice, and want you to remember that our thoughts are with you as always. He was indeed a remarkable character whose love and devotion would have brightened anyone's life; you were fortunate to have been the one to share his life with him, and likewise he with you. He could not have hoped, even in his wildest bunny fantasies, for a more caring, loving, bountiful and free life.
His absence will be hard for you, I know (just look at how much he's missed by people who never even met him!), but I'm sure you wouldn't do without that pain if it meant doing without your years together with him as well.

Thinking of you.
Malcolm

Glenna said...

Oh, we're so sorry, Pink and Elvis and Peaches and I, to hear about darling Fats. We loved him, and we love you too, and wish you all the best. He was so truly special.

Annette F Tait said...

sending special hugs from Scotland to you, Bells and Nuage.
Arabella, Wesley and I are thinking of you and you are in our hearts xxx
we love Fats :)

bunnygirl said...

Crying over here, Alice. Fats was one of my heart bunnies, even though I never met him in person. I'm so glad when his time came, you were by his side.

Binkies, sweet Fats. Go find Tidbit. She'll show you all the best clover at the Bridge.

Michelle (Shell) May said...

Loooooveeee, huuuuuuggggs,and more tears. Miss you Fatty boy. Kiss Chloe for me. Forever in my heart....forever...
Auntie.

Chris W. said...

Oh, Alice...I'm so so sorry. It's hard to believe such a big personality could disappear so quickly.

Fats brought a grin to everyone's face, he couldn't help but do it with those floofy ears bouncing all over as he galumphed towards you. He was a spectacular little bunny boy, and to say he'll be missed is a huge understatement.

Kiwi and Lily send nose-nudges, and I can just offer my deepest condolences, and gratitude for sharing your little fuzz-butt boy with us.

Paula said...

Alice, everyone has spoken so eloquently, all I can add is thank you for sharing Fats with us, he was a special, special boy.

Peanut said...

I'm so sorry to hear about Fats. Hugs to you. He was such a special bunny.

DK & The Fluffies said...

Oh Handsome - we will miss your fluffy adventures. We hope you are happy hopping in endless fields of dandelions and basil.

Our thoughts are with you - DKM, Sophia, Fiona Bun & Orlando Bun

Vicki said...

Hi Alice,

When you feel like it and if you give out your email address could you let me know what it is. There is something I found on the internet that I would like to send to you. My email is catwoman@imt.net.

Love,
Vicki

Julie said...

This is a beautiful tribute. I'll always feel blessed to have met (and been nudged by) the magnificent man-bunny in person. He was (I don't like saying 'was' because he's still with us in a different form) an extraordinary creature. And you are the best bunny Mom I've ever known.

The human said...

we've enjoyed following fats adventures. He was beautiful and we'll miss him. Love and strength to you Alice xxx

Pepper and Bella said...

Hi. We've not commented before, but followed your story. We're sorry that he's gone. His passing sounds like it was full of love right till then end - that's all any of us can hope for.

Lots of love to you.

Lisa said...

Dearest Alice,

When I read Tamara's comment, I ALMOST laughed a little, because I too am sitting in my office, in my fancy silly-pants, crying for our beloved Fats.

Though I didn't have the chance to meet him in person, I had the pleasure of following his life and adventures with you.

It has been a pleasure to watch the world-famous Fats eat, play, and love throughout his life. I have never seen a more affectionate bunny, more strongly bonded to his devoted caretaker. Rest assured that there has never been a bunny so beloved by so many, strangers and friends alike, and I don't think so many people have ever come together over a rabbit.

I know it will be difficult for you, beginning to move on when so much of your life has centered around Fats for so long.

If you ever need anything, we will be here, reading the archives, reliving our treasured memories of this most special bun.

My deepest, most sincere condolences.

Lisa, Biff & Sogna

Jade and Mickey said...

Mickey's friends on Bunspace have asked me to pass along their condolences and much love and blessings to you. Many of them are readers of PN and were very saddened to hear of his passing.

*hugs* You are in thoughts and prayers as always, my friend.

Lorna said...

Fats was a smile on four feet - even with tears in my eyes of learning his passing I can't help but smile as I watch him circle your feet. Perhaps an effort to make you dizzy so you'd fall over and let him kiss you.

I'd never seen a bunny more mellow, more full of happiness and love than Mr Fats and his every video, story, photo made me feel warm and fuzzy.

A true angel can't stay on earth forever, but their time is never enough. I wish I had words to help heal the jagged edges of the Fats shaped hole in your heart.

Lisee said...

No. No. No. The Fats that eats hay and poops has passed on. But the Fats that so many of us know from the blog has a life of his own. Why do we have to let that go? I think he should continue as a main character in the blog. He is transcendent. I feel like I know him and he still enriches my life. We need more Fatties in this world not fewer. Can't we just all conspire to keep the Blog version of Fats alive? Or transform him into a friendly furry ghost? Fats isn't about being sad.

That said, I've been weeping like a little girl since I saw the initial post and I send my love to you Alice, and also Bells and Nuage from me and the Meat rabbits. Losing my beautiful Judy this year broke my heart, so I know how hard this can be. Fats was lucky to have you and we are lucky to have you.

calicomomcat said...

Goodbye, Fats. You will be missed so very much.

Thank you, Alice for sharing him with all of us.

You are in my thoughts.

Paula said...

Alice, you have some fans in Pensacola who lurk here from time to time and I notified them on Facebook that Fats has gone to the Rainbow Bridge. They're very concerned and are sending you prayers and love. Fats will be missed by many.

Love to you, Nuage, and Bells,
PJ
Ranger Dog
Sweet William Grey
Miss Digit

Crafty Green Poet said...

Oh I'm so sorry, Fats was a beautiful bunny with a huge personality and a loving heart. We'll all miss him. Hugs to you, bells and Nuage.

YowlYY said...

It is never easy saying goodbye... you did a wonderful job in getting the strength to start the journey of goodbye, I love your words.
I am so saddened to know that the world has lost Fats - such a beautiful and loving bunny, we'll miss him too. Bells and Nuage will be giving you strength in these difficult days, and much bunny love. We, from the other side of the pond, can only send you virtual bunny vibes, and when we look up to the sky we may see a Fats shaped cloud riding the blue sky, and looking down at us with a smile... x x x